Disconnecting and Reconnecting // How do you define social media?

Today everyone holds connections in the palm of their hand. We can communicate to the other side of the world, across the country, down the street from someone and even behind the scenes of things we would never be able to hear about otherwise. From a 10 second photo on Snapchat you can see your best friends faces from across the country or you can see what Kylie Jenner is having for breakfast. Putting up one single Instagram photo can allow your followers to see your adventures from the weekend. Facebook allows us to make check-ins to the places we travel too.

At times these connections are glued to our hand - so when is the best time to keep them and when is it the time to lock the screen and focus on the physical connections with people. 

Remember shaking someones hand instead of poking them on Facebook?

When to Disconnect 

In the early mornings: You roll over, you swipe off your alarm and you check your phone. You have text messages, Snapchat videos, a new follower on Instagram and emails - you check them. This can determine how the rest of your day pans out. You see a Snapchat story that bothered you? Your ex is now in a relationship with another girl on Facebook? You lost 7 Instagram followers over night? Your best friend didn't text you back? Sadly, these small, insignificant posts on social media are taking a toll on us teenagers today - but why? We invest so much time into these little machines to the point where we think it's real life and to the point where we let it consume every ounce of our emotions. 

Stop it. Wake up, turn off your alarm and leave your phone alone. There are so many more positive, healthier and productive tasks to take habit of when you wake up. 

Try one of these when you wake up tomorrow morning:

- Think of 5 things you are grateful for while smiling to yourself while laying in bed and stretching 

- Sit up, or stay snuggled up and just meditate for 5 minutes and focus on your breathing 

- Grab a book and read a chapter from it 

- Immerse yourself in nature by going for an early morning walk with no music or phone; just you and the sleeping world 

I find that doing 2-3 things of these every morning sets me up for a energetic and positive day.

At a concert: You purchased a $120 ticket to a music festival to see 6 of your favourite artists on the line up - yet you are going to show your whole Snapchat the concert too. There is already the distance, fame, stage, mosh pit and an earbud standing between you and your living, breathing favourite singer who is in within 100 metres of you. WAIT, you better stop dancing and singing and Snapchat a shitty quality video to your friends, upload an Instagram photo of you 'having fun' and also make a check-in on Facebook, oh and you may as well reply to those 34 emails you forgot to do 2 days ago. Saviour this moment guys, turn off your phone and cherish the moment you have with your favourite bands while in the flesh. 

Homework/study time: I mean come on, seriously. It takes 30 minutes to answer those homework questions for Maths but instead you check Instagram every 10 minutes and what could have taken up a little time, has taken up your whole night. This is simple - put your phone in another room and get down to business. I'm pretty sure your friends won't miss you Snapchat photos for 2 hours. 

When with friends: Do I even have to say it? This should go without saying. You literally have your friends right in front of you - okay quickly take a Snapchat of your food if it looks THAT good. Now put it away in your purse or pocket, just put it away for god sake. Put that energy of scrolling through your feeds into a meaningful and thoughtful conversation, and really engage with your friend while sharing some chips. 

Out in nature: The whole point of putting yourself in nature is to have your senses activated, to smell the fresh clean air and to feel alive. But hang on, you better let the whole world know you are walking along the beach by doing a check-in. STOP. I mean for heaven's sake, listen to the air dancing in the trees, feel the earth crunch under your feet and witness the lush, vibrancy of the nature that surrounds you. Your roots. It is where you come from. Connect with it, feel with it and dance with it. Tuck your phone away in your pocket or leave it at home. 

When to Reconnect 

When you have no plans for the day: You have the whole world at your fingertips so why not use it for inspiration. Go on Pinterest and look up DIY projects, search up what art people are posting on Instagram or scroll through your Tumblr feed and save photos of anything and everything - clothes, food, quotes or sunsets. If the inspiration sticks, make something creative even if it's writing a poem, sketching a picture, decorating a cake or putting together an outfit for that groovy festival you are going to next week.

Working out: Plug in those headphones, turn on your smart phone and get moving. Fined some guided workouts on Youtube like stretching or yoga - download an app that tracks your running and beat your personal best. Instead of listening to music while riding your bike or working out at the gym, find an inspiring/educational podcast/video to listen to.

Eating out alone/waiting for your appointment: When you have this time alone - in between classes, waiting to see the doctor or if you are out at lunch alone or simply waiting for a friend, have a scroll on Facebook and see what your friend are up to. Maybe take the time to send your friend in Sydney a cute selfie on Snapchat. These are moments of easy time wasting, whether it is playing Candy Crush or stalking your celeb crush on Instagram.

Building up a positive feed: All over social media there is so many inspiring, creative and amazing people. I'm sure that you follow one, or have liked their page. You'll find that scrolling through your feeds seeing what your friends and family are doing can warm you with positivity, likewise, seeing something negative and unfollowing or un-friending can brighten up your timeline or feed also. If following those diet, healthy and skinny body feeds only ever make you feel negative, then unfollow them RIGHT NOW. You follow an Instagram or Tumblr page that post depressing, heartbreaking and sad girl quotes? UNFOLLOW - follow an inspiring and success quote page instead. Follow only those who captivate you with a positive and creative feed. Even if that mean following only close friends and family, and those accounts that inspire you in anyway possible.

Start questioning your social media feeds and how you utilise them. Is it bringing positive or negative energy?
After reading this, ask yourself...

Is what I'm sharing fulfilling? Does it represent my values or is it what I think my followers will enjoy?

Who am I following? Do you allow their feeds and posts to determine your reality?

How does it make you feel? Unhappy, unfulfilled or does it make you inspired to live and be positive?

Who can I follow or unfollow that will make me more inspired and creative?

What do I define social media as? Am I using it too much?

... And the most important question of all - am I letting social media define me?

Seeing things I haven’t before / Day trip to Ubud

As a result of my family going to Bali a number of times, we have already participated in so many ‘tourist’ activities and done the main exploring that is expected when going to the island. In my most recent trips, it’s more just like a holiday at home but away from my actual home. 

My most recent trips to Bali have consisted of relaxing, doing my own thing, spending time with good friends and exploring on my own. These trips we normally do one ‘touristy’ and exploring trip. This trip with Dad and Silvy we made our adventure through Ubud. Which surprisingly, I have never done in my past trips to Bali…

Pura Puseh Desa Adat Batuan

Temples are one of my most cherished places throughout Bali. They hold an essence that is simply magical and surreal. The fifth temple I have ever visited was this trip and it was on the way to Ubud. Every temple has it’s own unique features, stories, people and structures. I think I am infatuated with Balinese temples so much because they give out an eerie and surprising feel. While exploring them, with those ankle length sarongs, I feel enchanted and inspired. The Indonesian and Balinese culture inspires me immensely, and to this day it is the one culture that will always be close to my heart.

Tegenungan Waterfall 

It was all green. As far as the eye could see everything was every colour of green that you could imagine. Looking deeper into the sublime that surrounded us was a giant gush of running water falling from the rocks above and into the stream below. We had just over 70 steps to trek down in order to reach closer to the waterfall, and the closer you were to the running water the more beautiful it appeared. Being unaware that you could swim in the waterfall I didn’t have swimwear to have this experience, but the time being surrounded by this utter beauty was enough to complete this sight by just observing, what I do best! 

Ubud Monkey Forest

This destination is always somewhere every single person that visits Bali wants to go and explore. This trip was my first time here because it has never appealed to me to go. But this trip, we did and it’s nothing that will blow your mind away. The monkeys are enjoyable and fun to look at, some get a bit feisty and and some get a little crazy. It’s all fun and game until one of them steals that lady’s sunglasses. What amazed me was the forest and sacred temples and holy water in the actual forest. These were the parts I enjoyed most, I prefer to take it all in than have a monkey run at my feet and attempt to climb my back like a tree.

Teras Padi Cafe, Tegalalang, Ubud 

This is just one of the little secret get aways situated along the sublime view of the terraces of rice paddies and fields. Rice paddies and fields are the one single thing that still, to this day, fascinate me when going to Bali. I could look at them for days on end. The infinite green hills and endless amounts of beauty, these attractions all over Indonesia, even Asia, are pure, natural beauty. It is their way of life, their way of farming, they farm rice just like where I come from we farm cows. Our driver gave us a little hidden cafe to eat lunch at, and oh boy, it was a lunch with a view. As if the view wasn’t on point, but the meals were delicious too. 

These are the little experiences that I hold close to my heart, and observing and taking in everything that I can satisfies me greatly. 

Will I regret my tattoo? - The reason behind my tattoo

Coming to you from the pool side…

When the word ‘tattoo’ gets heard in a conversation some people will say something like, “You’ll regret it in 20 years” or “Your body is too precious.” Some other people will say something like, “Your body, your choice” or “You must be openly expressive.”

I can see all points of views on tattoos, the good and bad. I agree on some, and disagree on others. I can see how they can be regretful but I can see how they can be preserving a memory for a lifetime. I can see how our body is the best canvas for forms or expression but I can see how tattoos are not for everybody. 

A tattoo could mean anything to anyone, but it is up to that individual with a tattoo whether or not they are content with sharing their tattoos ‘greater meaning’ or whether they don’t want to reveal it was a drunken mistake. For many, getting this permanent ink for eternity is much more than a name of a family member on your wrist, a random flower on your ankle or a dragon on your thigh. It can be about closure and can be a healing gap for something you have experienced. It can represent a loved one or that time you went on holiday. Tattoos are on the surface, but they go beyond skin deep. 

The many people that do have a tattoo or many tattoos are going to ink which ever body part they like in any style, shape, form and colour they wish. They do this for self expression because their body is a canvas and they honestly do not care if you are able to ‘appreciate’ it or ‘accept’ their decision. A tattoo can be a rash decision, or a hard thought planned tattoo. “You’ll regret it”, “You ruined your body” or “You’re too young” or even “What a waste of money”, comments like these can be taken into offence or can be agreed upon. Their ink may be close to their heart and you have just called that flower that represents her dead mother a “waste of money”. “I bet you regret it” is said to a guy with the name of his first girlfriends on his chest but you just put him down even further than he already felt. It all depends on the individual and the reason behind their tattoo/s. Yeah they might regret it. Yeah later on in life that might think they were too young at the time of their first tattoo. Yeah they might have spent a little too much money. But how does that effect you in ANY way? You aren’t inside their body, you don’t have to feel their regret. We are all born with our own bodies and what we decide to do with them should not matter anyone other than ourselves. 

Do you honestly think that planning an idea, creating a design and enduring the pain of the ink on us that we are “wasting our money” or “ruining our body”? I see this as love and passion at some point or another. Just because someone does not understand your reason behind a tattoo does not mean that it is not worth getting. I find tattoos the most beautiful way for self expression.

So, why did I get my tattoo? I got it for a long list of reasons, some too personal to share and some are quite obvious to those close to me. After I explain the symbolism behind my tattoo, you may have a greater understanding at what I am getting at:

On my back I got inked the symbol of a lotus flower and a symbol of an unalome. The wavering ovals are the human desires that distract us and as the ovals decrease moving towards a straighter line pointing downwards it signifies the path to enlightenment; reaching for Nirvana. For the lotus flower, this represents rebirth and purification of the spirit, the unalome is the path to this. 

Now, you are probably thinking, well why on earth did you get this, Tylah?

Well, I got this permanent decision done because those ovals are the ‘distracting’ things that I’ve experienced in my life, like getting emotionally attached to people, thinking less of myself than what those close to me perceive me as and the many challenges I’ve faced. 

This tattoo represents the journey I must undertake in order to end up where I am destined to be. It is there to remind me everyday that I must move on from my past distractions, current distractions and distractions that I may face in the future because they hold me back from the journey to finding who I am and making the most of this life I have been given. 

I will carry this tattoo with pride and joy as this is something I am proud of and to reflect what I want out of life. Someone very close to my heart said to me this morning, “Most people will never understand your tattoos intricacy. But will still think that it’s beautiful in multiple senses despite. The people who do understand it love you for the person that you are and what you represent, which is the same with your new ink.” In a nutshell, this is how I want people to view my decision of this tattoo that I now have on my back for the rest of my life. 

My experience: I got this ink done in Bali by my Dad’s tattooist who is recognised as a high quality artist who has tattooed skin all over the world. I don’t think I will have anyone tattoo me other than him. His work is incredible and he shows his talent. Obviously I knew getting this done was going to hurt, and it did. But you’d be surprised when I was under the needle that it wasn’t even that bad, even while I was very sunburnt. Especially for such a big piece for my first one. I was expecting more pain, but I clearly get this pain tolerance from my Dad who has many, many tattoos. This tattoo was worth that hour and a half and I really enjoyed getting this done. 

What made you smile today? - Mornings on the beach

Coming to you from a very sunburnt body in bed…

Everyday is full of the simple things that bring us joy… Whether it be your husband coming home from work, a funny text from your best friend, a long walk along the beach, sitting with some mates having a beer or even being snuggled up in bed with a good book. What is one little thing that made you smile today? 

When you think about it, most of us, including me, forget to enjoy the simplicity of life at times. We crave so much happiness from big things and look too far into ‘finding’ happiness. Most of the time it can be all around you, you just aren't taking notice because your attention is turned to finding something bigger. These tiny special things are blocked by our stress, anxiety and ‘busy’ lives that we claim to lead. STOP. BREATHE. Take a good god damn look around you and pick out five things that put a smile on that face. Look up from your phone right now and look at the 360 degree view that surrounds you. Look hard. Study what you see. I bet you smiled at least once, or even more. You would be shocked if you observed more and just how much little things catch your attention and bring you joy. 

Well today, a lot of things put a smile on my face and warmed me with joy. It was the little things. The very little things. 

My morning started with a long walk along the beach at 7:30am, here are five things that made me smile:

1. The water was so clear and the way the waves rolled onto the shore so gently
2. Four young Balinese children full of laughs were splashing each other in the water 
3. A local Hindu praying and doing their offerings 
4. Just how warm the sun was on my skin after coming out of hiding from the clouds after three days
5. And, lastly… Watching a Balinese fishing boat sit on the shore floating along with the current  

I’m Not Vegan Anymore? - Visiting Kuta / Bali, Indonesia

Coming to you from the poolside…

In life you meet a very small handful of people who are special to you. They bring you complete joy, they warm your heart and they offer the most pleasing company. 
In my handful of these people, that are close to my heart, reside in the area of Kuta in Bali. Since coming to Bali since 2009 I have come across the most beautiful souls. This is my eighth time on this paradise island, and I know the difference between those who are your ‘friend’ because of the things you buy from them and those that are your friend because you both bring joy to each other and share honest care to each other. Each trip the bond becomes stronger yet as I get older it becomes a little more fun because I can share a Bintang or five with them! It is true when they say, it is not the place that makes it but it is the people that make it. Bali wouldn’t be my favourite place in the world if it wasn’t for the people.

I’m not going to sit here and write about these people, because I’d honestly be sitting by this pool all day… Yet, that doesn’t sound like a bad idea, does it? But I will tell you, that one of them is the most kind-hearted, gentle and grateful individuals I have ever met and he never fails to make me smile. He gives us his ‘cheap shit’ (jewellery and accessories), but the bond is so close, our family to his and we always help him when he is in need. Another young man, the most funny and down to earth person I have ever met, the most popular Balinese you’ll ever meet. He is a true Balinese, but conveys the most hardcore Aussie accent I have ever heard. I can sit with him for hours and talk utter crap with him and I know if I ever get into trouble while on the island, I can rely on him. Lastly, a lady that resides on the island, but is not Balinese. She puts her heart and soul into protecting the dogs of Bali, and will go out of her way to put them before herself. Her passion, and kind and warm humour is the best company to be around.

I mention these three individuals because they have had the most impact on me. I have met SO many people like these three, but my connection with these crazy, but amazing people is unique and special. I love being around everyone I have met in Bali, and I enjoy all their company. The Balinese are incredible people, the best people I have come across. Whether it’s my Dad’s tattooist, that guy that owns the pub, that man that sells the ice-cream I met when I was 11 or whether it’s that security guard outside our favourite resort. All of them, have a special place in my heart.

Now for the question of the day, am I still living a Vegan lifestyle? That answer today is negative. From yesterday, I cannot call myself a Vegan anymore. Not because I am against the lifestyle, or I think it is not the healthiest way to eat anymore. Rather it be a gut instinct, and coming to the realisation that it has psychologically been difficult for me. I am not living this lifestyle anymore because of the pressure it has had on me for the past few weeks. Not a negative pressure, or an unhealthy result it has had on me, but rather that it holds me back. I still wish to live with a plant-based and whole foods diet and avoid dairy as much as I can. But, I will not let the pressure of consuming an egg or a sprinkle of cheese let it define me. If I want some scrambled eggs, I won’t let the label of ‘Vegan’ stop me, and if I go out to eat in public and there is no non-dairy option then I won’t let that anxiety come back to bite me on the ass. 
My mental state and psychological health is more important to me than anything, if my diet is causing so much anxiety and strain on me then I need to do something about it. The path I now lead will be Vegetarian, and I need to get my digestive system in order by slowly introducing diary back into my system, or there will be hours on the toilet…

I do still support the Vegan movement, and I wish it was educated more into society and I will aim to put a meat-less and non-dairy option first, but if that cannot be the case then that will be OK to consume dairy or meat. I feel mature about this decision, and I am confident to say that a full Vegan lifestyle is not for me. I am still an advocate for the treatment of animals, and understand the effects the meat and dairy industry have on the animals. But as everyone should, putting our mental capacity at risk can be threatening, and putting ourselves first is most important. I was over the anxiety and depressing feelings from certain aspects of the lifestyle. Life is too short, and at the end of the day what we put into our bodies is our decision. There is no point in stressing over the most simple thing that us humans have to do in order to survive… EAT!